Getting back on the water

I hate the feeling I always get the first week of spring season. It's this bizarre combination of worry and anxiety with excitement to finally be going back on the water. I get so nervous about not feeling like I belong, even if I know that they like me and I know my erg scores will improve and I will find the rhythm again. I haven't been in a shell since November and it's nerve wracking. Especially when the line-ups say that I'm in the men's boat. In the middle of the men's boat. I'm all of five-foot-flat and about 135, these guys tend to the 5'10" and taller at about 200+. IDEK. But this means that I'll be rowing port on my first day back which is strange and kind of exciting - I haven't been port for a while.

Ack, need to leave in about 15 minutes.